May the Lord Bless You and Keep You

    I've finished up my final semester of high school this week, and I've made the transition from student to alumni in the past short days. It has been well over a month since I have last posted a blog, mostly due to the sorry fact that I forgot the email address I used to sign in. I remembered though! And alas, so I write. C.S. Lewis said "Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different..." True that is. These past few days I've realized this potential of rapid change. There is an ache ensured within the cold moment of knowing that things are changing. As though knowing there's a quick moving train, speeding along the tracks and you're unreasonably afraid of it. Then, in a seemingly endless moment that happens all too quickly to comprehend, you come to find that you're on that train, and you're beyond the point of returning to where you started. A rough analogy, granted, but in the sense of nostalgia, indeed there's a certain resemblance between the two circumstances. I have been accepted to College of the Ozarks for my fall semester as a freshman college student. Only a 6 hour drive from my home now, so I am fortunate in the distance: not too far for a weekend trip; not close enough to visit every weekend. That alone is an incredible transition. But what has been on my mind and my heart recently is that this distance will not only physically pull me away from the people here, but also emotionally. I am in a moment of sincere vulnerability; as though I am being shaped and molded. I am continuing to be led by the Spirit of the Lord, and in that I'm discovering a lot about who I am as a member of the Body of Christ. That's awesome! This change, however...it's a difficult one. In a college preparation book I read through (actually, multiple books mentioned this), it is emphasized that things will change while you are away. It's unsettling, almost. I fear that all changes will be for the worse. Oh dear this a poor way of thinking. After a neat day of tandem bike riding and salsa making I sat with my friend Kristie at a picnic table in a field of freshly cut grass, eating chocolate donuts and talking about the finality of our high school experiences. She said something inspiring, something I'm afraid I hadn't thought much about: "hopefully in the next four years of college, [we] will change for the better." It was something I needed to recognize as an alternative to this unreasonable fear of the oncoming future. I am incredibly different from who I was four years ago. A difference that has undoubtedly been for the better. And I wish that for everyone. This year my jazz band teacher finished up his 29th year of teaching at our high school. As a tribute, the band, choir, and orchestra performed the song For Good from the musical Wicked. Yes, that is a good song. like a ship blown from its mooring by a wind off the sea like a seed dropped by a sky bird in a distant wood. Who can say if I've been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better. And because I knew you I have been changed for good. I have been blessed in a marvelous amount of ways these past few years. I love you Carly, Summer, Claire, Sammi, Josie, Madi, Kristie, Meagan, and Nate. The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace. Numbers 6:24-26